Worst Dressed at 2016 Oscars!!

Are you ready? Okay here it goes. My Top Five picks for worst dressed celebs at the 2016 Oscars are: #5 Kerry Washington #4. Jennifer Lawrence #3. Cate Blanchett #2. TIE! Chrissy Teigen and Heidi Klum #1. TIE! Common and Pharell Williams and wife.

Kerry Washington in  Atelier Versace.

Kerry Washington is wearing an S/M Dominatrix's idea of an evening gown. It was made by Atelier Versace, Gianni must be rolling over in his grave at this hot mess of a dress. The bodice looks like the bottom of a turtle's shell covered in black grease. The only thing I like about this gown is the slit and the fit of it. It fits Kerry like a glove! I hate Kerry's hair, looks like she rolled out of bed and grabbed a scrunchy and pulled her hair into a pony tail and said let's go. What was you thinking gurl?

Jennifer Lawrence in Dior.

Jennifer Lawrence, who normally slays the crowd just fell back into the cheap seats with this hot mess of a dress. I can't believe Dior made it? Are you sure about that? We have seen this gown so many times, it is just so boring. Spaghetti strapped bodice with a ruffled ball gown skirt. Yawn! And why are there 3 black straps on the Princess lines and center front seam? Why was this not cut on the fold then you would not need a seam down the front!!! Hello? Normally Jennifer is either very edgy or very elegant this dress is neither. It is just very pedestrian and can be purchased at any mall in any Sears or Kmart store across the United States. (Oooh SNAP! That was a read! hahahaha)

Cate Blanchett in Armani Prive'.

Wow! Where do I start? This looks like a cartoon character that has a some sort of disease all over it's skin and the poor thing needs to killed and taken out of its misery. Cate Blanchett is wearing Armani Prive' which is a well known designer but this doesn't even qualify as a Prom Bomb! Oh I know,  it reminds me of my feather duster that I use to dust my apt. hahaha The color is awful, too pale and the feather appliques are way too busy and totally detract from the gown's fish tail silhouette.

Chrissy Teigen in Marchessa.

Chrissy Teigen is wearing a gown by Marchessa but she looks like a used tampon that someone forgot the flush down the toilet. The beading on this gown is way too busy!!! The only good thing about this dress is that you cannot see Chrissy's lady parts through the dress. hahaha thank you! hahaha

Heidi Klum in Marchesa.

Heidi Klum is wearing a mother of the bride symetric one sleeved Prom Bomb hot ass mess by Marchesa. Heidi who has a slamming body is all covered up in this ugly dress that looks like someone stole the sheer curtains from someone's mansion to make this dress. The 2 flower appliques are too small and should be cut off the dress, then the bodice needs to be re-worked and pick a style. Is this a one shoulder long sleeved dress or an asymmetric draped bodice with cut outs. Don't use every technique that you know on one dress. So too many ideas going on here. Learn how to edit yourself Miss Georgina Chapman! hahahaha

Common in a white tuxedo the designer was not identified. 

Rapper Common in a white tuxedo designed by anonymous. I'd want to stay hidden too if I designed something this stupid. Hey Common, I'll take a black and tan sundae and a crab sandwich to go please.  Dude what were you thinking? I know wearing black all of the time is boring, that's why you should have picked navy or purple or emerald green. But definitely NOT a white suit that makes you look like someone who works at an ice cream parlor!!! #oscarwinnersdontdresslikeicecreammen.

Pharrell Williams and his wife Helen.

What is wrong with these 2. They NEVER dress appropriately for any awards show. I am all for doing stuff differently and trying to stand out in the crowd. But come on now! Rolling your pant legs up above your ankles to show off the fact that you are not wearing socks is just out right retarded. Yeah,  I said RETARDED!!! On t he one hand you want to reward Pharrell for wearing long pants but then he goes and rolls up the legs. Why? So stupid!!! Now, I really think that there is something wrong with him mentally!!! If you want to stand out, wear a color other than black. Or do like Kevin Hart did and have the edges of your jacket beaded with crystals. So you have blingy sparkles. Stop dressing like a 5 yr old little boy Pharrell. And Helen's dress is just worst than pedestrian, not even Kmart carries this look any longer. Total snooze fest!!!

There were other jacked up looks but these were my 7 top disaters. All of these people are very wealthy and can afford to buy any dress or suit that they like what their problem is, they have terrible taste in clothes. Most the women dont even buy their Award show gowns, they are loaned to them by the big designers and free PR. I was really disappointed that the Academy requested that pre-show interviews no longer could ask, "Who are you wearing?". They wanted to get more from the actresses. Look, that is the #1 question on everybodys mind. Good, bad or indifferent!!!